Monday, August 9, 2010

Actual Newspaper Headlines! Read If You Need a Good Laugh?

Willys cynical thought for the fugging day,



This sign will be posted wherever I work: "We don't discriminate against crazy people, but if you're stupid you're on your freaking聽own!"



*Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says



*Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers



*Safety Experts Say School Bus Passengers Should Be Belted



*Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case



*Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents



*Farmer Bill Dies in House



*Iraqi Head Seeks Arms



*Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?



*Stud Tires Out



*Prostitutes Appeal to Pope



*Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over



*Soviet Virgin Lands Short of Goal Again



*British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands



*Lung Cancer in Women Mushrooms



*Eye Drops off Shelf



*Teacher Strikes Idle Kids



*Reagan Wins on Budget, But More Lies Ahead



*Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim



*Shot Off Woman's Leg Helps Nicklaus to 66



*Enraged Cow Injures Farmer with Ax



*Plane Too Close to Ground, Crash Probe Told



*Miners Refuse to Work after Death



*Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant



*Stolen Painting Found by Tree



*Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies



*Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years in Checkout Counter



*Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years



*Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One

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